Thursday, May 24, 2007

No, I'm the One Who Is Magic

Somebody--and we won’t say who--is a little hyper over the fact that a new Harry Potter movie is coming out soon. I’ve read one chapter of one book (bored me silly) and have seen the movies (not bad), but I just don’t understand the allure.

But now, Harry Potter is getting older and graduating soon, right? That means there must be a new Harry Potter, a new character to take his place. I suggest me. I could be Lefty Copperbottom, running around performing magic and saving my sidekick friends, the klutzy Tommy Armpits and the beautiful Angelina Jolie-Muggle.

Reasons why Lefty Copperbottom should hit the big screen:

  • My Tapatio hat and yellow blazer would drive women crazy.
  • I am fluent in that snake language.
  • I like jelly beans (except the vomit flavored kind).
  • I have an oh-so-sexy American accent.
  • I know how to do things with paperclips.
  • I could use the money.

If you all begin a letter-writing campaign to Warner Brothers, together we can convince them to make Lefty Copperbottom and the Order of the Curmudgeon.

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Anonymous brandy said...

As a die hard HP fan (if it was the first book you started reading, I understand why you don't 'get it', the first book is horrible), I will support you in your quest to become the new Harry once the last movie/book have both been released. You mentioned you are excellent with Parseltongue (the snake language), but how are you with a broom?

1:03 PM  
Anonymous xboxgirl said...

When I first starting reading the 1st Harry Potter book I bored to death but I kept on reading because the lady who gave me the 3 first edition Harry Potter books was very nice.

She was always sending me gifts even though I only met her twice, and those Harry Potter books were the weirdest thing she sent me, so I thought I'd better read them since she might be a fan. I still don't know if she ever read the books.

I don't know if I even like the books or not all I know is that I {sort of} had to force myself to start reading each book but when I get somewhere in the middle I just have to finish reading it. So I guess that makes them decent books.

Anyway, the long and the short of it is I ended up reading all the books out so far [6].

5:53 PM  
Blogger Bre said...

I know Harry Potter, and you sir are no Harry Potter.

6:13 PM  
Anonymous g-dog said...

you can contact WB, but may want JKR's support too Mr. Copperbootie

7:17 PM  
Blogger SWF41 said...

I have to think about this before I can support your quest. There's only one "..Harry...just Harry..." I have to think about whether this could be a Roger Moore replacing Sean Connery scenario (yuck!) or a Daniel Craig picking up the reins (pretty hot!). I'll get back to you.

I think you'd make a great Leftysnickets, though. How about that one? :D

6:06 AM  
Blogger DCchick said...

SWF: I'm excited too! I'll be seeing it the first weekend.

Lefty: Um, you know an aweful lot about the Harry Potter series than just one chapter of one book and one movie! :)

9:55 AM  
Blogger Lefty said...

I sensed a lot of low grade hostility toward my request here, people. I never knew HP fans were so testy.

Brandy--haven't touched a broom in years

xbox--I hope you got the paperback editions; if not, you'd better have someone check the foundation of your house for cracks

bre and g-dog--you two are some very angry HP fans; you'd think that I had just spit on JRK's grave!

swf--I await your decision with bated breath

dc--HONESTLY, I've only read that one chapter (my wife and son, though, are a huge fans; maybe it just slipped in by osmosis)

9:01 AM  
Anonymous g-dog said...

I'm not angry* - I applaud your ingenuity (though it is rather late in the game to jump the HP bandwagon) - I am just saying you will need some good marketing and what better source than JKR!

*Man, this writing stuff just doesn't always convey the correct message

5:41 PM  
Anonymous xboxgirl said...

Nope all the books are hardback.

9:08 PM  
Blogger SWF41 said..., the first six books are all out in paperback, too.

I know...I have a full set in hardback at home, and a full set in paperback at work.

Lefty, I'm still leaning towards my Lefty-snickets. I don't think I could give up Harry.

5:57 AM  
Blogger Tink said...

*Squee* An American accent! How hot! Sign me up.

10:54 AM  

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