Wednesday, May 09, 2007

The Gray Days of May

The saga of my hair continues. After my last haircut disaster, I chose a different barber. He was a chatty, conventional fellow, so I figured it would be a good match.

We discussed my particular haircut needs, and when the question of length came up, I tried to describe what I wanted. He was a little unsure of what I meant, so he said, “I’ll cut it to a medium length, and if you want more, I can cut more.” Apparently, what he meant by “medium length” was “so short everybody can see the lice crawling around on your scalp.”

Mrs. Lefty, who always thinks my hair gets cut too short anyway, was furious. “You’re never going to him again,” she said.

Then, as we were riding in the car this week, my wife snorted at me with glee, “You’ve got gray!” Ack! It is true. I have never before noticed gray on my head, but there they were, accentuated by my new haircut, two wiry, gray hairs.

I guess this is it. My life is rapidly coming to an end. You can all begin to prepare your remarks for my memorial service. I’m sure your tributes would bring tears to my eyes if I were still alive.

Also, coming up this week...
  • The long awaited paperclip-buttonless pants diagram.
  • My trip to the emergency room just before I went out of town on business.

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11 Comments:

Anonymous LVGurl said...

Why is it that gray hairs are like little wires? WHY?

Paper-clipped pants? You should have told me. Ponytail holders work much better.

I'll be waiting for the ER story...

6:00 PM  
Anonymous xboxgirl said...

Yay lefty is back!
Your new hair cut can't be as bad as that 'horse cut' last time, even if now everyone can see lice crawling and silver wires sticking out of your scalp.

6:28 PM  
Blogger Bre said...

Dude. I'm turing the big 2-5 quite soon... this makes me feel like I have 900 grey hairs. Sigh.


Also, maybe you should take to cutting your own hair... it might be safer!

6:31 PM  
Blogger Lefty said...

lv--I guess once we're old and gray Mother Nature figures there's no longer any need for soft and silky hair to attract a mate.

xbox--you're right; my new haircut is better than the last one.

bre--maybe I'll get a flowbie for Father's Day, and then I can cut my own hair and blog at the same time.

7:51 PM  
Blogger Sizzle said...

i'm on the edge of my seat.

10:16 PM  
Blogger Tink said...

Oh shut up. I'm 24 and have new white hairs popping up all the time. I like to pluck them out and show them to people in disbelief.

8:16 AM  
Blogger little miss mel said...

never a dull moment in your house.

and you have two gray/grey hairs? I think you have gotten off lucky in all honesty!

Please tell me you only had a case of bad gas and thought it was something much worse...

8:48 AM  
Blogger HippieChyck said...

once i was having my hair chemically straightened and the hair dresser got to chatting on the phone. i waved and signalled frantically, then finally had to rush to the sink to wash the solution out myself. leaving me with *actual burns* to the scalp.

guess how many grey hairs i have as a result.

9:51 AM  
Blogger SWF41 said...

Gray hair doesn't bother me. My fabulous hairdresser covers it up in a jiff. Well, really, 20 minutes, but who's counting?

I am, however, dreading the day I find gray pubic hair. I know it's coming. And I live in fear.

10:48 AM  
Blogger Lefty said...

tink and mel--you're supposed to give me comfort in this horrific moment, not tell me it's not so bad. Where's the love?

hippie--all of them?

swf--I didn't mention that I've got one of those gray pubic hairs; just one. Go figure.

2:14 PM  
Anonymous g-dog said...

SWF41 - when my mom was in the hospital one of the nurse's was pretty funny. She told me when someone starts telling you something you don't want to hear (TMI) you plug your ears and instead of repeating "la, la, la, la...." you singsong "grey pubic hairs" (like you were going to sing "ring christmas bells") --- well, it really does make you forget what the other person was saying...

Lefty - you've got one in a place you can see, unless you've got a bunch of mirrors arranged to check all angles.

6:40 PM  

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