Despicable and Ancient
She took the belated phone call well, though. After all, she only gave birth to me and loved me even when I behaved like the aforementioned maggot poop.
Also, I am apparently very old, even ancient.
This looks just like me, only my teeth aren't in such good shape.
My 12-year-old son and I were watching a television show about the 30th anniversary of Star Wars. When the hosts mentioned that it was Star Wars’ 30th “birthday,” my son turned to me and said, horror in his voice, “You’re older than Star Wars!”
A long time ago, in my galaxy, not so far away...