WWC: Disguise and Reflection

I've been wanting to get in on the Weekly Words Challenge (WWC) game, mainly for the cash and prizes. Anyone who enters gets free beer. At least that's what I've been told.

Tink runs this shell game over at her place, and you can get the complete rules there. The idea is simple--get two words, take two pictures. I've decided to take pictures that say something important about me, because if we've learned anything since 9/11, it's that everything is about Lefty.

DISGUISE
REFLECTION

See how it works? Simple, eh?

Hiding Behind the Keyboard

Earlier this week, Tink linked to a blog entry about the time her boyfriend, the irrepressible Hoop, first learned about her blog, Pickled Beef. If I understand the story correctly, Tink began writing her blog, but decided not to tell Hoop about it. I'm sure she had a good reason. Perhaps Hoop's brother was killed by a rabid blog or something.

I mention this because Mrs. Lefty doesn't know about this blog. It isn't, as you can see, because there is anything objectionable about the content. Sure, she might box my ears for sharing less flattering bits about her even though I write anonymously. I've even changed her name to protect her. Her name isn't really "Mrs. Lefty."

I don't tell her, though, because she'd be upset. Mrs. Lefty has had some really terrible things happen to her--terrible, awful things that I wouldn't wish on an enemy. As a result, her perception of the world is often skewed. She sees threats everywhere. When she is particularly anxious, she imagines threats that aren't there.

The amazing thing about Mrs. Lefty is that despite her fears, despite the trauma of her past, she is a genuinely loving, caring, generous woman. She is always the first to offer help or a shoulder to cry on. She hasn't let her past stomp on her spirit.

Yet, this blog would be a threat to her. It is a part of my life that would feel separate from her, and she would feel that she is being set up to be hurt. She would wonder about the people who read this and imagine the ways they could hurt her. And after a while, that fear of potentially being hurt would be indistinguishable from the real thing. She would actually believe that she was being wounded.

That's why Mrs. Lefty does not know about this blog. There is nothing here that she couldn't read. Yet the very fact of its existence would cause her to panic.

And that's why I feel a certain measure of guilt. Am I being selfish and inconsiderate? Or am I simply doing something that is as harmless as keeping a diary (with feedback)?

I don't feel as if I am doing anything wrong, but I feel that Mrs. Lefty would be hurt by it. How can that be?

Things Are Going to Start Happening to Me Now

The avalanche of accolades is poised to sweep over me at any moment! Granted, the current avalanche tally is only one solitary snowflake, but you’ve got to start somewhere, eh?

Yes, you guessed it. I have won a major award. And I mean MAJOR.

Tink, over at her blog Pickled Beef, displaying her excellent taste and superb intelligence, presented me the Thinking Blogger Award. Thank you, thank you. Thank you. Please, that’s enough applause. Really, that’s fine. Please...

First of all, I’d like to thank my beautiful wife, who doesn’t even know this blog exists, ‘cause if she did, she’d kick my butt from here to Nairobi and back for airing all of our dirty laundry in public. And I’d like to thank my secretary, who has given me many reasons to whine and complain, therefore giving me the opportunity to post many a scathing entry. Thank you to Al Gore for inventing the Internet and giving me--and so many other deserving bloggers--this opportunity. And finally, thank you to Tink and the Academy. I am both honored and humbled.

Now, about the loot. Tink gave this important award to five bloggers on her post "Skull Shaped Blog", so that means that of the estimated 1.8 billion bloggers in the world, I rank in the top five. That is quite an achievement, don’t you think?

Due to the impressive nature of this prize, I naturally assume there is a monetary award, as well. This has got to be as big as the Nobel Prize, so I figure I must be getting at least $1.5 million out of the deal. I am expecting Tink’s check in the next month or so. Of course, I’ll give some to charity. The rest I’ll either invest in petroleum jelly futures or spend on beer. (And I think we all know which way that’s gonna go.) Plus, then there are all the great endorsement deals. Looks like SOME blogger isn’t going to be a working stiff anymore!

And now, the best part of the deal--I get to award five more lucky bloggers. Now that I have won this thing, I know you have a lot to live up to, but I’m sure you’ll do just fine, all of you.

First up, and no surprise, is Sizzle at Sizzle Says for her excellent coverage of the 2000 Presidential election.

Next, Eileen Dover at eileendover.com for her groundbreaking piece "Ten Ways to Shag a Sheep." Great work, Dover.

The third winner is Bre at Win or Lose, We Go Shopping! She wins for her description of the health benefits of bathing in a tub of champagne.

The Retropolitan Presents: Tales to Astonish! is the fourth winner. Retro wins for his ten week series "A Short History of the Stuff Growing on My Feet."

Finally, congratulations to Love Monkey at I Guess This Is It. The Monkey wins for her photojournalism piece "Up Close and Personal with My Duodenum". The blogging world doesn’t really want to know how you got such great pictures, Monkey.

To those of you who are winners, please stop by here to pick up your award and receive further instructions.